once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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