I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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