So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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