eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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