we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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