drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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