im about as happy as oj after his trial
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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