Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
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i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
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Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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