sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
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