...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
My feet surprised me
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