she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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