I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
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