You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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