Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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