barbara walters just said penis...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize