i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
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he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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