Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
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Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
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Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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