If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Acid is not a monday night drug
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize