Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize