idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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