Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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