Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
love makes seman taste better
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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