you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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