He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
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