We named our party play list daddy issues
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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