Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
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his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
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she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
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