You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
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69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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