Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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