do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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