I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
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At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
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Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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