You're my little dorito
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Just cropdusted the office
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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