I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
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