Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
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