I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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