I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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