puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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