did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Pappa wants mamma naked
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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