what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize