I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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