I intend to get homeless drunk
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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