I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
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Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
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Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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