just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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