I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize