His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
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dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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