so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize