Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize