I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
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One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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