I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize