party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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