I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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